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“Help me to be joyful even when life’s not fair.”

At 35 years old, you never think you are going to hear the words, “I’m sorry, but you have cancer.”  That’s exactly what my husband was told this week.  WOW!!!  Shock, fear, confusion, and disbelief all came to mind.

D found out Wednesday night/Thursday morning that he has rectal cancer.  We spent the last part of the week in a whirlwind of doctor’s appointment, culminating in an attempted biopsy on Friday afternoon.  The surgeon was hopeful that he got a good sample, but we won’t know until Monday or Tuesday.  Next week we will meet with some more doctors and have some more scans done.  Then, the plan as of now is to start chemo and radiation on the 6th.  He will go 5 days a week for 6 weeks.  After that he will have surgery, followed by another 4-6 months of stronger chemo.

All this leaves me wondering, “Why?” Why my husband?  Don’t they know that he has a family? Don’t they know how young he is?  And the answer I keep coming up with is “God does!”  God is not surprised by any of this!!!  God is good all the time, even when we don’t see it.

“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for peace and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” Jerimiah 29:11

We don’t know what the future holds.  What we do know is that God’s in control.  If you see me in person, there may be times I need you to remind me of this.  My desire is that God get the glory through all of this.

We have told our 6 year old, “Squirrel.”  We have simply told her that Daddy is very sick.  We have not used the “C Word” because the only people she has known with cancer have all died.  So if you see her, please be cautious of your choice of words.  She doesn’t understand everything that is going on.  She told D last night that he didn’t look or act sick.  But she does know that it’s going to get worse before it gets better.

She says it’s not fair, but when she prayed last night her prayer was “Dear God, Please help me to be joyful even when life is not fair.”  Life is not fair, but we are blessed.  I pray we will continue to find joy even when times get hard.

What we need right now is your prayers. Please pray that the cancer has not spread. Please pray that we have wisdom in choosing doctors. Please pray that he will respond well to treatment. Please pray for peace and comfort. Please pray for healing. Pray for God’s will to be done. And most of all pray that we respond to this whole situation, no matter its outcome, in a godly God glorifying manner that clearly testifies to the hope that is within us.

2 Responses to ““Help me to be joyful even when life’s not fair.””

  1. Amy

    Oh Lindsey!
    I am shocked and so sad for you. I can imagine the multitude of questions swirling in your brain right now and I am sure that everyone tells you to trust, relax, have faith, all of which is very true but oh so hard to do. I have nothing to offer but prayers and so with that I will stop writing and start praying. Much love,Amy

  2. Julie Wood

    Praying for y’all. If you a great oncologist you should try Dr. Robert Weisberg in irving. Praying for peace for y’all.

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